Hoffenheim twinned with Hull?

How very refreshing to see two of Europe's biggest leagues dominated by two new boys - two teams in unfamiliar waters.

OK, Hull City aren't dominating the Premier League, but they are joint second, unbeaten away from home with four wins out of five and are the surprise success story of the season so far.

TSG 1899 Hoffenheim are top of the Bundesliga with six wins out of nine, have scored more goals than any other team and destroyed Martin Jol's Hamburg at the weekend.

Like Hull, Hoffenheim were expected to struggle - a team new to the big time, in unchartered territory.

But they have stormed to the top of the table playing attractive, attacking football along the way. Much like Hull.

The wheels will more than likely fall off of Hull City's bandwagon, but their impressive start has added an extra dimension to what could be perceived as a predictable Premier League, with the Big Four seemingly untouchable.

As for Hoffenheim, Jurgen Klinsmann, Bayern Munich's coach, believes they are serious Bundesliga contenders.

Udinese top Serie A, with Napoli in third, and Catania in sixth. Roma, runners-up last season and in this season's Champions League are 15th!

And in Spain Valencia are the early pace setters with Malaga in sixth.

Lyon, of course, are top in France.

European football, for the time being anyhow, isn't quite as predictable as it once was.

*Latest on the new, new Zizou*

Yoann Gourcuff has continued to light up Le Championnat and is living up to his billing as the new, new Zidane.

He scored a Zidane-esque goal the weekend before last that left me little shy of moist in the pantalon department.

There's more from Yo here and here.

Interesting Yoann - Petit Zidane - Gourcuff fact - Gourcuff's hero is not Zidane, it is in fact Remi Garde.

Football, football, football (whilst shaking head)

Harry Redknapp to Spurs. Who saw that coming?

Spurs have shelled out a shit load of cash, yet again, on paying off Juande Ramos, Damien Comolli, Gus Poyet and Marcos Alvarez and had to pay Portsmouth £5m compensation to acquire the services of Redknapp.

I wonder how much Spurs have spent in compensation and pay-offs over the last few years? Hoddle, Santini, Jol...

They needed to do something drastically and they certainly have. Spurs fans will be delighted with the appointment I'm sure, but can Harry really turn it around at the Lane?

If they fail to beat Bolton today, they'll head into the North London derby on Wednesday night still searching for their first Premier League win of the season. Ha!

If Harry fails to keep Spurs up, they'll go down having forked out £60m (OK they sold Keane and Berbatov for £51m, but at what cost, relegation?) in the summer on players, plus whatever Harry is given to strengthen the side in January, plus the £5m compensation for Redknapp and what must be at least £10m pay-off for Ramos, Comolli and their cronies.

What appalling business that'll be.

I think they'll have enough to stay up, and I couldn't imagine a season without a North London derby - it just wouldn't be right.

But if I was a Spurs season ticket holder, I'd be non-too-happy with Daniel Levy... especially if 'arry does as he did at Southampton - take the club down then shoot back to his comfort zone.

Amazing Harry Redknapp fact: Apart from stating that he used to follow Spurs when he was a kid, it is common knowledge that 'arry was actually a Gooner. He's already sliding down in my estimation.

Mixed fortunes for Champions League legends

The Champions League returned with a bang this week. A joint record 36 goals flew in on Tuesday night, and Barcelona stuck five past Basle last night.

Some beautiful goals amongst them as well - an outrageous no-look pass from Dani Alves finished off with aplomb by Lionel Messi, my personal favourite.

Juventus beat Real Madrid 2-1 thanks to a wonder-strike from Alessandro Del Piero, rolling back the years with a trademark curler into the upper 90. Score!

He may not be as quick as he used to be - not that he was ever lightening - but he still has the class to turn it on when it matters.

The Old Lady have made an abject start to their Serie A season but they pulled it out the bag on Tuesday night to beat the nine-time winners, Madrid.

One Madrid old-boy - and Champions League legend in the same bracket as Del Piero - fared a little worse than the Juve number 10.

Roberto Carlos had a night to forget as Arsenal, and in particular Theo Walcott, ran him ragged.

I've been a big fan of Carlos, although he was never in the same class as Paolo Maldini for me, but there's no doubting that he has been up there with the best left-backs for the past decade.

At 35, maybe this will be his last season with Fenerbahce as he's certainly lost a yard of pace (although in fairness he was marking one of the quickest players on the planet in Walcott) and had to opt for cynicism on a number of occasions to stop his man.

Robert Pires cameoed for Villarreal, coming off the bench to set-up one and score another in the Yellow Submarines' (isn't that one of the best nicknames in football? If you can think of any others that top that, ping me an email - Spurs season ticket for the best entrant) 6-3 hammering of Aalborg (who coincidentally are managed by Bruce Rioch! Random!).

A Champions League name from years a yonder, Dynamo Kiev, have made an impressive start to this seasons' competition, sitting second in group G, two points behind the Arsenal.

Olexandr Aliyev is a player to watch out for (especially if you're sat behind the goal of Kiev's opponents) as this lad has a hell of a dig on him.

He smashed in a 35-yard free-kick against Porto and could be a rival for Lyon's Juninho as the world's best dead-ball expert.

Talking of free-kick maestros (is he really though? Or has brand Beckham made us believe he is?), David Beckham is of course moving to Milan on loan, although the MLS are already getting worried about their Superstar leaving them high and dry.

LA Galaxy coach Bruce Arena says Becks will not spend the rest of the season there, as has been touted, as that will mean him missing the start of the MLS season.

Ruud Gullit, who knows a thing or two about LA Galaxy and AC Milan, believes that if the move goes well for both parties, Beckham will want to move to the Giuseppe Meazza permanently.

And who could blame him? The MLS really hasn't taken off as he may have thought his arrival would have done for the US soccer league (SCORE!).

When you weigh it up: Champions League football, an 80,000 capacity stadium, the passion and history of Serie A and playing with world class players such as Kaka, Ronaldinho and Phillipe Senderos, versus playing in front of 382 fat root beer swilling yanks, with a bunch of limited players in sweltering heat... Hard one that.

Backing the Lame

A mate of mine makes a bet with one of his pals at the start of each season on which new Premier League striker will score the least amount of goals. Ingenious!

In the past he has had the upper hand on his buddy, with astute picks such as Mateja Kezman, Grzegorz Rasiak and Andriy Shevchenko.

His mate may as well pay him the 20 notes now after he opted for Amr Zaki! The Egyptian's seven league goals would appear to have lost the bet already, especially as my mate went for Roman Pavlyuchenko!

Amazing Roman Pavlyuchenko fact: Spurs Director of Football, Damien Comolli, made Pavlyuchenko his main transfer target (well, after Andriy Arse-Shavings laughed them off) after examining his stats on Football Manager. This is a fundamental example of how the game's greatest minds work.

Comolli used the same technique when signing the midfield starlets Didier Zokora, Kevin Prince Boateng and Adel Taarabt (once hailed 'the new Zidane'), and defensive stalwarts Ricardo Rocha, Younes Kaboul and Benoit Assou-Ekotto.

*Breaking News* Bruch Rioch is no longer manager of Aalborg. He has just been sacked. Seriously. He was back in our football consciousness for a brief moment there for the first time since 1996. How fascinating this game is.

New-found respect for Roy Keane

There is never any doubting what a quality player Roy Keane was, even fans who still hate him to this day would not be able to deny the impact he made on the Premier League.

And he was my favourite pantomime villain - I loved to hate him, I really did.

Even when he, rightly, made the shock decision to go home from the 2002 World Cup because of a matter of principle: he felt the management and organisation of the Ireland team just was not up to scratch, I sided with Mick McCarthy.

I wished that the FAI would throw the book at him and his dog would have coiled a sloppy one on his size 9's during that famous televised dog-walk.

I found it hilarious when he ruptured his cruciate ligament when trying to hack down Alf-Inge Haaland.

I found it disgraceful when he ended Haaland's career a few years later in that revenge attack.

'I'd waited long enough,' wrote Keane in his biography, 'take that you c@nt and don't ever stand over me again sneering about fake injuries.'

Apart from dictating midfield, Keane's fortes were challenging every refereeing decision with intimidation and stamping on players (even the inoffensive Gareth Southgate?!) - even Alan Shearer, a players player, didn't get on with him.

He was the mirror-image of his manager. 'Win-at-all-costs' was his mantra.

But since he hung up his Diadoras and went into management, his geniality, respect for other managers and players, general approach and insightful pre-match and post-match interviews have won me over.

Sunderland drew nil-nil with Fulham at the weekend, but had a Kieran Richardson goal harshly ruled out. Almost every other manager in the league would have complained after the final whistle yet Keane's post-match interview was candid.

No grumbling, no complaining, he just took it on the chin.

Gone is his snarl and foul-play: his trademarks. In its place is a calmness and sense of fair play.

His players seem to follow code. Apart from El Hadji Diouff, there aren't many Black Cat players who fans love to hate.

He's bought well in the summer and has assembled a squad which should have no problems this season, may go on a decent cup run or two and may upset some of the big boys along the way.

I never thought I'd say this but good luck to him.

Amazing Roy Keane fact: The Irishman can grow a full-beard in 17 hours. On planet football, only George Best, Alan Cork and Socrates can beat that.

Normal service resumes - the Futsal World Cup Final

The international break has been and gone meaning one thing: the return of club football. 'WOO HOO' I hear you cry, grown men are throwing their children in the air, women are kicking their knickers off, children will be having a sleepless night tonight due to the excitement.

The Premier League sees no less than five 3 o'clock kick-offs, so Jeff and the boys will be busy, Gary 'the adulterer' Lineker and his cretinous colleagues will have to do some 'work'.

Plus there's an 12.30pm and an 5.45pm match on Sky and Sultana respectively.

Not a dull fixture among them too. Everton trek to the Emirates looking to emulate Hull's heroics, while Gooners will be expecting their team to bounce back from a couple of lousy recent performances with three points.

In-form Villa lock horns with in-form Pompey; there's a long-ball derby.. I mean Lancashire derby as Bolton take on Blackburn at the Reebok; much-improved Fulham face much-improved Sunderland, and Torres-less Liverpool look to continue their impressive start against Wigan.

The early kick-off comes from the Riverside as Southgate's youngsters will be aiming to halt Chelsea's early-season charge, while Man Utd face West Brom in the late one.

Promises to be an interesting weekend, with story of the season thus far, Hull, against West Ham and a relegation dogfight with Stoke against Spurs offering an enthralling Sunday afternoon in front of the box...

I won't be bothering with that as I'm tuning in to Eurosport 2 for the Futsal World Cup Final.

You probably won't know much about this as England seem to be the only nation who don't take this form of the game seriously, which is ironic given our climate and the fact that Futsal is an indoor sport.

That's right, England didn't qualify.

So what is Futsal? In Lehmann's terms: 'GET OUT OF MY FUCKING PENALTY AREA BEFORE I STAMP ALL OVER ZEE TOES OF YOU AND YOUR TEAM-MATES!'

And in layman's terms, Futsal is 5-a-side, played with a weighted size 4 ball aimed at improving touch and technique.

Emphasis is on quick, attacking play as you only have four seconds to take a kick-in (instead of throw-ins) and free-kicks, and sliding tackles are not allowed - that's why you won't find me playing.

But you will find me watching as it is so very skillful. Robinho, Ronaldinho and Deco grew up playing the game which just shows that, apart from stunting your growth, Futsal (Spanish fusion of the word for 'hall' - Sala - and 'football' - futbol) obviously improves your touch, increases speed of thought and movement and general raises the level of technique.

The FA are looking to get Futsal, ahem, rolling but have they been trying that hard? Probably not.

Get kids playing it around the country, games will never be called off due to a waterlogged pitch, they won't lose interest due to warming the bench as there's rolling subs, and it's non-stop action so they'll love it.

It's a no-brainer so sort it Triesman, for the good of the game in England. NOW!

Jules Rimet still gleaming and the new, new Zidane

International football isn't what it used to be. Give me Champions League over the Euro's any day.

Don't get me wrong, I love to tune in to the African Cup of Nations, if only for comedy goalkeepers and Mark Bright's commentary, or the Copa America - plenty of Latin flare on display.

I fell in love with the game around the time of football's rebirth - Italia 90 - and we haven't had a better World Cup since. Following England has been painful and I, like so many others, lost interest in them.

But Don Fabio may be winning me over - even if England were dire against Kazakhstan at Wembley last Saturday.

My one fear is that he falls into the trap of forcing Steven Gerrard AND Frank Lampard into the team at any cost.

Two world class players no doubt, but they just cannot perform in tandem. Lampard has earned his right to start ahead of Gerrard at present and Gareth Barry just has to play in order to anchor the midfield as he has done astutely of late.

Gerrard doesn't perform on the left, and with Theo Walcott's hat-trick in Zagreb cementing his place in the starting line-up for the foreseeable future, for me, there's no place for him at the moment other than on the bench - what an amazing player to have on your bench!

Joe Cole has been one of England's better players over the last two years so when fit, and if in form, he'd get my nod. As he isn't fit for Belarus tonight, I'd love to have seen Ashley Young given a go.

Imagine it, Walcott and Young terrorising fullbacks on both flanks... That hasn't happened though as Capello has gone for the same midfield that started against the Borats.

Have you heard about the new Zidane? Bordeaux's Yoann Gourcuff is the latest of Les Bleues' young playmakers to inherit the moniker.

Franck Ribery, Samir Nasri and Hatem Ben Arfa, all quality players in their own right, have all been dubbed 'the new Zizou' and now it's the turn of Gourcuff.

After a spectacular long-range belter against Romania at the weekend, maybe the French Press are right this time...

I'm not the biggest fan of players being labelled 'the new Maradona' or 'the new Van Basten' or 'the new Carlton Palmer'.

Ribery, Nasri and Ben Arfa all play from the left or right for their clubs and we all know that Zidane was a maestro from the centre of the park, a unique player who's technique resembled no other.

Maradona was the same, and there have since been many young Argentine starlets compared to him since.

The latest, Lionel Messi, is truly world class and has the ability to make his mark on the history of the game, whether Gourcuff has the same pedigree remains to be seen.

Forgetful Rio strikes again

Rio Ferdinand branded England fans 'ignorant' and 'immature' for booing Ashley Cole after the Chelsea left-back cocked up a back-pass and gifted Kazakhstan ('I liiiike') a goal on Saturday evening.

Hold on a minute, I know fans are supposed to back their players but they pay good money to watch their team and they have the right to offer their opinion.

Who does Ferdinand think he is? This is a man who was banned from international football for not attending a doping test because he 'forgot'.

Just because he now does a bit for charity and was wearing the armband at Wembley last night, doesn't mean he is now some sort of mater.

And let's face it, Ashley Cole hasn't done himself many favours recently, what with the Arsenal-Chelsea transfer saga and then cheating on his wife, not to mention a certain incident with a mobile phone.

Forgetful Rio seems to forget that if it wasn't for the man in the street paying ever increasing amounts to go and watch their team and line the pockets of the players, football would not be the cash cow it is today.

Let's look at the facts: England were playing against a team ranked 131 in the world, at home, in front of just shy of 90,000 people, and off the back of a morale boosting 4-1 win over Croatia.

Having taken the lead through an own goal, Cole gaffed for Kazakhstan to equalise. To their credit the visitors excelled themselves, knocking the ball around nicely whereas England, midfield in particular, played like strangers.

Ferdinand apart, England didn't defend with the concentration you would expect from a top-class group of professionals representing their nation.

The fact they scored five goals was not enough to pave over the cracks of what was, Zagreb aside, another inept England performance that we have come accustomed to.

'Immature' maybe, 'ignorant' most certainly not. 'Entitled' would be more like it.

Engage brain before speaking from the heart Rio, that will gain you more fans than foes at a time when Team England is still quickly running out of enthusiastic interest despite topping their group with three wins out of three.

Eboue the Clown - diving is here to stay

It's the international weekend... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. So while he's away from London Colney I'm going to discuss the mystery wrapped inside the enigma that is Emmanuel Eboue.

I have a love/hate relationship with Eboue: I love it when his twinkle-toes come out and he sends full-backs for a cuppa tea. I hate it when he shoots from distance as he resembles John Jensen. And I hate his play-acting.

When Eboue first burst on the scene a couple of years ago he was a breath of fresh air for all Gooners - he was the reason Arsene Wenger sold Lauren, a fans favourite.

Eboue played with such freedom, like a kid with scuffed knees taking on the playground. Wenger even likened him to Garrincha! How silly that comparison seems now.

Last season he began to rile away fans, neutral observers and even some sections of the Emirates with his diving and willingness to try and get his opponents in the book at any given opportunity.

It's cringe worthy and irritating. Of course Eboue isn't the only player that does this in the Premier League, but he has fast become one of the most hated players around because of his antics.

But hasn't diving become a skilled part of the game? And Eboue's not bad at it.

Jurgen Klinsmann was one of the fore fathers of the dive.

And you couldn't watch a bit of Football Italia on Channel 4 without seeing more than a spot of play-acting litter the game.

And everyone remembers sweet, innocent Michael Owen's glorious dive against Argentina at France 98. Nobody held that against him.

Every team has at least one serial diver. Chelsea have Drogba, United have Ronaldo, Liverpool have Torres, Spurs have the entire team nose-diving to the bottom of the league...

Is diving a part of the game that we should embrace? 'What's your new striker like then?' 'Quality. Quick, strong, great in the air, sweet left peg, fantastic diver...'

I still back Eboue when he pulls on the red and white shirt, just as long as one of his dives actually wins a penalty, and he doesn't shoot!

You call him Mikel Obi, I call him Obi Mikel. Let's call the whole thing off.

All this fuss about John Obi Mikel (AKA Mikel John Obi) and why? Oh yeah, we're in the midst of a credit crunch and Chelsea are desperately trying to scrape together enough pennies to pay the TV licence. Do me a favour Mr. Abramovich.

The truth will come out as it always does. Bruce Buck will pen a book, just in time for Christmas, that will be serialised in the Daily Express.

The real reason the Blues are opening legal proceedings against Mikel's (or should that be 'Obi's') former club, Lynn Oslo, to recoup the £16m (this isn't a typo!) transfer fee they paid for the Tracy Chapman lookalike is because they realise just how badly fleeced they were.

Mikel is no Winston Bogarde, no Mateja Kezman, no Slavisa Jokanovic. The boy can play, but is he quite as good as they believed he would be?

After all, Chelsea paid off Manchester United in order to let Mikel join them despite United already agreeing terms with the player, with £12m of the £16m transfer fee going to Old Trafford. They badly wanted him, but Sir Alec must still be smiling about that one.

Or maybe Chelsea have followed Gordon Brown's lead and thought 'fuck it, the Government are taking on Iceland, nows the time for us to give it to their Scandinavian neighbours!' They do seem to think they can do as they please.

I dunno, it's a funny ole game (cliché crime, and a Jimmy Greaves catchphrase to boot, I can only apologise).

Mission Statement

This is a sports blog. My sports blog. Your sports blog. Our sports blog.

Essentially I'm going to blog about football (soccer for our US friends) - my passion - but also other happenings in the world of sport.

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